Notes on Swazi Culture #1: Gender Roles

6/30/2011

RMH

Seeing that we are about four weeks into Pre-Service Training and only have one blog post to show for it, this one will be a little more comprehensive than usual. First, it is important to know that we are doing great here. Learning SiSwati is difficult, as to be expected, but we are trying our hardest to be at least mildly proficient by the end of our two years. Luckily, almost everyone is fairly fluent in English here and can usually carry on a conversation in our native tongue after our obligatory three-four sentence baby-talk in SiSwati.

A recent change has taken place in our training. For the first two weeks in our Community-Based Training we cooked with our host-family, trying to learn how to cook traditional Swazi food, which usually consists of at least three starches and a protein (corn as the base ingredient in at least two of those starches.) Cooking with Make Joyce on a wood-burning stove with no ventilation was an experience, to say the least. During this time Make definitely took to Addy (Bongiwe), teaching her all of the responsibilities and trials of being an Umfati (wife), while I was relegated to maaaybe peeling a potato or squash. You can tell the faith she had in the ability for an invodza (husband) to tackle roles that are traditionally “woman’s work”. In fact, this strict bifurcation of gender roles and responsibilities has been one of the most difficult things for us to overcome in integrating into the Swazi culture.

In our relationship, Addy and I prize our ability to be “equally yoked” in our roles and responsibilities. We both worked full time and divided chores equally in our apartment in SLC. Needless to say moving to a country that not only divides the roles of men and women, but generally puts the sexes on unequal ground was going to be a difficult transition. So far, we have managed to create a minor scandal by a neighbor “catching” me doing laundry outside when our Make was gone, and Make “catching” me sweeping our front porch one morning before class. What is difficult about this is not trying to hide the fact that we split up chores evenly but finding an abundance of man’s work on the homestead that keeps me occupied, while Addy assists Make in the umfati chores. So far I have managed to keep busy helping neighbors set controlled brush fires around their property and helping MDuduzi valella (herd) tinkhomo (cows) into the kraal (pen) in the evening.

To extend this further into our purpose as Peace Corps Trainees we have learned that one of the reasons why Swaziland owns the dubious title of having the highest HIV/AIDS rate of infection in the world is because of gender inequality. If a woman does not feel empowered to ask her husband to help with the dishes, how much less empowered would she feel to ask her partner to wear a condom during sex or ask her husband to stop having “multiple concurrent partners” with women who run a very high risk of being HIV positive?

While we realize that this is a traditional role that does not extend to all households, this has been the first major hurdle we have had to overcome in terms of Swazi culture. This past week, however, we have been cooking for ourselves and are more easily able to divide chores in the privacy of our own hut. We hope that our somewhat clumsy attempt to show and explain our philosophy of equality in our relationship reflects positively on our American culture.

6/30/2011

ANH

(Just adding on to Ryan’s previous thought, and some thoughts of my own.)

Although there have been hurdles to overcome (and will continue to come), Swaziland is showing us some short-comings of our own.  Swaziland is a communal country, and puts the community before the individual.  Although this can be frustrating at times, it is refreshing to see neighbors actually being neighborly, and extending a hand, food, etc. whenever possible. On our homestead you will see several neighbors daily coming in and out trying to help our Make (Mom) with random tasks that she and Mdu cannot do on their own.  Make and Mdu are in charge of a considerable amount of land for only two people, (and us coming into the picture is not much of help considering we have no idea what we are doing i.e. No, I do not know how to slaughter a chicken, YET!), and it is refreshing to find that neighbors nearby extend a hand whenever possible. 

Speaking of slaughtering animals, I witnessed a pig slaughtering today.  I will not go into details yet, because I have not fully processed the horror that I witnessed, but, to say the least, it was…educational.  The pig was being slaughtered for a two-day wedding ceremony that will take place tomorrow and Saturday.  They have killed one pig, and will kill two cows for the celebration.  I have always had a soft spot for animals, but talked myself into witnessing the event based on moral principals (If I am okay with eating pork, I should be willing to witness the process from beginning to end.) To that I say – I do not think I will be witnessing the cow slaughtering.

I have to put in a short word for our “Mom” here in Swaziland.  She has taken us under her wing as she would her own children.  She watches out for us daily.  She makes sure we are up and going at the right time, that we are dressed properly, that we have eaten, etc.  Not only does she watch out for us, she has taught us many things even in the short time we have been here.  I spent two weeks in her kitchen cooking dinners with her, which gave Ryan and I a lot of time to talk to her and learn about Swazi culture and traditions.  Most importantly, however, she has taught me the true strength of a Swazi woman.  Being a woman here is a challenge for many reasons.  Women are expected to be purely homemakers, but due to shortcomings in income, you will find many women working outside of the home.  Although women work outside of the home, that does not dismiss their duties to their families at home. Men take care of the cattle and other farm animals, and build the homestead, while women are expected to carry on chores on the homestead, including cleaning, cooking, taking care of the children, etc.  It is exhausting. My Make was laughing at me one day because I refused to take the pot off the wood stove with my bare hands.  That is right.  She grabs the pot full on with her bare hands, even at the base of the pot.  She says her hands are made of stone, and I believe her. 

Things that I do miss about the USA:

-          Family and friends

-          Showers

-          Running water

-          Fridges

-          Toilets that flush

-          Heaters

-          Jeans

-          Youtube Videos